


Melancholy

by ultboos



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-10
Updated: 2018-05-10
Packaged: 2019-05-04 19:48:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14600400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ultboos/pseuds/ultboos
Summary: He waits until he could see his lover again.





	1. The Heart Of A Young Dreamer

Seungkwan waved at the crowd. The crowd looks like the stars in the galaxy with the light emitting from their phones. Seungkwan’s eyes began to water and tears soon ran down his cheeks as he recalls his earlier days in his career as an artist.

There weren’t many audiences who came to his first concert, but having his family and his best friend, (Y/N), as audiences is more than enough for him to be happy. He wouldn’t have made it if it weren’t for their constant support, but especially (Y/N)―a young girl who made him dream big.

This brings him back in the days when they were young. Seungkwan was just twelve when he met (Y/N), who was eleven at that time―both lived and were raised in Jeju.

It was dismissal and Seungkwan headed to the music room. His friends know that he loves to sing but none of them know how serious and passionate he is about it. He has a heart of a young dreamer whose goal is to become a singer someday, but he knows he’s being ridiculous.

The boy pressed a key on the piano, followed by another, making harmonious sounds as he begins to sing as concurrent to the tune being played. He sings a ballad.

(Y/N) was outside of the music room, silently listening to the voice that captivated her the first time she heard him sing. Though she doesn’t know who the boy is, she still always finds herself listening to his voice. The way he conveys his emotions through a song in such a young age is the reason why she’s very enthralled.

When Seungkwan saw something that looked like a person’s head through the window, he immediately stopped. He gets uncomfortable when other people listen to him.

The girl finally entered the room and met his soft gaze. “Why did you stop?”

The boy’s eyes widened as he recognizes the girl in front of him―(Y/N)―one of the journalists of their school paper. He has been a fan of her ever since he read one of her poems in the school paper.

“(Y/N)? Wow, I’ve always been a fan of your works! I love reading your poems in the school paper.” He said, enthusiastically. “My name is Seungkwan, by the way.”

“Oh, thank you,” the girl laughed, shyly. “Nice to meet you, Seungkwan. I guess we’re a fan of each other then.” She added which made the boy laugh.

It really started there, in the four corners of the music room. Where they both discovered how their passion influenced them at a young age. With Seungkwan and his singing. And (Y/N) with her writing. It was really a precious memory for them.

“You have a very beautiful and soulful voice! You shouldn’t hide that talent of yours.” (Y/N) smiled. Little did she knew how that little boost pushed Seungkwan to try taking a step closer in making his dream come true. She reminded him of reasons to keep going, to never stop trying, to keep improving better despite the obstacles he may face but not forgetting how to have fun along the way. 

But mostly how every word is still intact in his mind, with the picture of the young girl’s smile, and how brightly she looked his way. Seungkwan likes the girl’s optimistic personality. She was very smart and was so good with words in such a young age. They really did find their connection into each other at that moment.

_ With every word she inks onto the paper and with every note he plays, they were brought together―and that’s how two young aspiring artists met. _

 

It was half past seven in the evening. Seungkwan and (Y/N) were in the rooftop garden of their apartment building, gazing at the stars above. His place is only two houses away from (Y/N)’s, so both of their parents allowed him to sleep over at her place.

He started singing, filling the quiet night with his dulcet voice. And in that moment, (Y/N) knew that among the stars that light up the dark sky, he shines the brightest with his own light.

“I don’t share this to anyone, but…” Seungkwan paused for a while. “I want to become a singer someday,” he finally said, expecting the girl to laugh, but she only smiled warmly at him. “You’d be a great singer someday, Seungkwan. With your talent and personality, I’m sure you’ll last long in the industry.”

And ever since he opened up to her about his dreams, they’ve become best friends. She doesn’t judge easily. Thus, he felt comfortable sharing all his stories and secrets with her.

He will never forget all the memories he had shared with her. She’s the reason why he can stand in front of the oceans of people today. He’s been making music and touring all over the world for years, and he must admit, although it was fun performing in front of large crowds and meeting adoring fans, it still gets tiring.

_ It’s time to stop. _

 

Seungkwan exits the stage and started packing his things. That was his last concert before he retires from his career. He will always remember the tears he and his fans had shared before saying goodbye. He will miss them.

While he was on his way home, he saw a video of his thirteen-year-old self on the billboard when he was singing in school. It’s a way of honoring Seungkwan before he retires.

It was at that time (Y/N) convinced the older boy to sing at an event in school. He was, of course, hesitant but she didn’t stop pushing him until he finally agreed.

The first line already left the audience mesmerized. They grew silent as they let themselves get lost in his voice. The students and teachers never knew how talented the boy is.

A tear escaped (Y/N)’s eye, unknowingly. There’s just something baffling about his voice, and the way he sings with so much emotion―it’s ineffable. She then noticed how beautiful he really is, especially when he closes his eyes, enters his world and gets lost by his passion.

(Y/N) admires him, and that’s when she started writing  _ for him.  _ And maybe… that’s when she started liking him, too.

 

> **_His Voice_ **
> 
> _ The mellifluous tones of his voice _
> 
> _ Put my heart at ease _
> 
> _ Lulled by the sound he makes, _
> 
> _ I get lost in reverie _
> 
>  
> 
> _ Is it the tenderness of his voice? _
> 
> _ Or perhaps the words he utter? _
> 
> _ Or his cloying expression? _
> 
> _ I am not so sure _
> 
>  
> 
> _ Whatever it may be, _
> 
> _ My heart always sings with glee _
> 
> _ Then I begin to cry _
> 
> _ And express my deepest sentiment _
> 
>  
> 
> _ How strange yet astonishing it is, _
> 
> _ To feel everything at once _
> 
> _ Just by hearing the sweet sound _
> 
> _ Of the voice that enraptures me _

 

She never tells him and plans to keep it that way. She did that for three years and just continued writing for him in secrecy, until one night…

The rooftop garden has always been their frequent place whenever they wanted to be alone together. It also became a place where they shared their most treasured memories together. They were there during spring in the evening.

“I have a secret to tell you,” the boy began. “I like someone, and I think she likes me too.”

(Y/N) suddenly felt her heart drop and her expression fell into a gloom. “Oh,” she simply said. “Good for you then. It wouldn’t be hard confessing to her.” She smiled at him, though her expression seems empty.

“Do you think I should?” Seungkwan asked, eyes twinkling from excitement.

“If you share the same feelings then I don’t see why not.” She told him, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible. “So, who is it that you like?” She asked, a bit reluctant.

He leaned closer, locking eyes with her as he glances at her lips. “You,” he said, softly, grinning at her.

The sudden confession of the boy left the girl through a rollercoaster of feelings as she thought her feelings will be left unrequited. (Y/N) punched Seungkwan lightly on the shoulder, feeling her cheeks flush. Seungkwan laughed at her reaction, finding her cute, but his laughter soon died down once she pulled him closer, pressing her lips against his. The night ended soundly with how their lips collided as if the stars aligned for them that night. And so, they shared their first kiss at the age of fifteen and sixteen.

A year after that, a talent agency called Seungkwan, informing him about the video he saw. Unbeknown to him, his teacher uploaded a video of his performance on the internet. The talent agency from Seoul who contacted him came across the video and saw the passion and potential in him. Thus, he wanted to train him more and make him widely known.

“This is your chance, Seungkwan! Didn’t you tell me you wanted to become a singer?” (Y/N) said, effusively.

Seungkwan hesitated. “Yeah, but…"

(Y/N) held both of his hands and looked directly at him. “Don’t let this opportunity go to waste, Seungkwan.”

Seungkwan breathed deeply and tightened his grip on (Y/N)’s hands, tugging at her heartstrings with his intent look. “Will you be okay if I leave you?”

(Y/N) paused for a while, trying to collect her thoughts before speaking again. “Of course, this is your dream and I want nothing more than your happiness.”

And so, he made the decision.

Seungkwan hugged (Y/N) tightly than he ever did before. They were at the airport with his family.  _ It’s time to say goodbye. _

“You’ll wait for me, right?”

(Y/N) nodded, “Ever since I was twelve, all I ever did was wait for you to like me too. Waiting for you to come back won’t be any different,” she paused then placed her hand on his chest, “as long as your heart beats for me until then.”

Seungkwan chuckled. As cheesy as they could get, he answered her, clutching on her hand which was on his chest.

_ “It will only beat for you, always.” _

They made a vow, then let each other go. She watched his retreating figure as he vanishes through the crowd.


	2. White Dress

Seungkwan got home and was greeted with a glum atmosphere. It was so much different coming home to the people he loves. He misses home. _He misses her._

He went to his room and saw the bed untouched. A memory from his past flashed through his mind…

Seungkwan had just came back from tour that time. He was already making it big in the music industry and his manager let him rest for a short time.

Seungkwan saw the love of his life once again. Through the years, (Y/N) had grown into a remarkable young woman. Being separated for five years only made them yearn for each other’s touch. Their minds were clouded by raging hormones. Temptation had never tasted as sweet as the day they made love to each other for the first time.

“I miss you,” he whispered as he stares at her, lovingly. Her eyes twinkle more beautifully than the stars that night, putting the stars to shame.

“I miss you too,” she said, softly, brushing her lips against his, before pulling him down for a kiss.

He wrote poetry on her body with his lips and she was stained with his love just like pen and paper. She had waited for this moment to happen―to taste the love from his lips while skin meshes with skin.

 _“I love you,”_ they both said in unison, breathlessly as his body collapsed on top of her.

 

> **_Kiss Me_ **
> 
> _Kiss me when the rain falls_
> 
> _Let our lips dance in the pouring rain_
> 
> _Kiss me by the tree,_
> 
> _When the leaves fall in Autumn_
> 
> _Let me fall for you once again_
> 
> _Just like how the leaves fall_
> 
>  
> 
> _Kiss me softly when the sun rises_
> 
> _Let me be awaken by your gentle touches_
> 
> _Kiss me deeply when the night falls_
> 
> _My love, before we fall asleep,_
> 
> _Whisper your desires to me_
> 
> _And let me know your dire temptation_
> 
>  
> 
> _Just kiss me, darling_
> 
> _With the lips of a sinner_
> 
> _And heart of a saint_
> 
> _And mark me as yours;_
> 
> _Forever I will be_

 

Their night together at home was filled with love and affection, but his night alone in Seoul feels lonely and empty. He can only whisper his love underneath his breath as he waits for the time to pass by.

 

He had one last interview before going back home. The interviewer asked about his love life and he didn’t hesitate revealing it to the public. He even told the time when he was in a store. He was looking for a ring―yes, he has made up his mind―he’s finally going to propose to the woman he loves.

Although all of the rings would probably look nice on her finger, he was looking for the most beautiful one. Then, he found a flower diamond ring and it reminded him of spring when they started falling for each other. And that was the ring he bought.

Right after buying the ring, his mother called him. “Seungkwan, you’ve got to come home,” his mother said, trying to sound as calm as possible, but her voice cracked which made him worry.

“Mom, is there something wrong?” He asked, warily.

“Just come home, sweetheart,” his mother said one last time before hanging up.

 

The next day, Seungkwan flew back home. He went to the place where his mother told him to meet her. He entered the room and felt his whole body get weak. If it wasn’t for his mother, he would’ve fallen down. He put every bit of his energy into approaching the _bed_ of the woman he loves―he was in her funeral.

The young man started crying upon seeing her pale face with her white dress. “This isn’t the _white dress_ I wanted you to wear,” he sobbed; his voice shaking. “Why?”

Seungkwan’s mother stroked his back, trying to comfort him. He tried muffling his sobs by covering his mouth, but it was uncontrollable. And just like that, his whole world crumbled in just a snap of a finger. He couldn’t hear everyone in the room anymore, just his outburst; only making it worse when he heard his love’s sweet voice as if she spoke to him that time.

(Y/N)’s mother approached Seungkwan and hugged him. “I’m so sorry, son.”

 

Seungkwan stares blankly at the wedding ring he bought her. His mind was in a haze.

When the visitors had already left the funeral, (Y/N)’s cousin, Jihoon, together with his wife, Seolhee, approached the young man; with a baby in her arms.

“Seungkwan…” Jihoon spoke.

Seungkwan shifted his eyes to the couple. “Jihoon, Seolhee…” he greeted, politely. The baby immediately caught his attention. “You have a very pretty daughter.” He smiled a little, admiring the little girl in front of him.

“Actually, Seungkwan… this is yours and (Y/N)’s child.” Seolhee spoke softly, giving the child to him. He stretched out his arms and cradled the baby, and his heart gets filled with delight again. “W-why did she keep this from me?” Seungkwan’s voice quavered, caressing the baby’s head as his eyes began to water once again.

“(Y/N) didn’t want you to worry. You see, she was having complications during pregnancy, so she wasn’t sure whether the baby will live or not. It turned out to be the other way around. I’m sorry, Seungkwan…” Seolhee said, sympathizing with him.

“Actually, she was planning to tell you after she gets treated but the next thing we knew, it took a toll on her health.” Jihoon explained. “But I guess you can still consider yourself lucky that your child was saved.”

“What’s her name?” Seungkwan asked as he plays with the baby’s hands.

“Her name’s Bomi. She told me that you gave that name when you were thinking of baby names for your future children.” The young woman stated. “It’s because of the spring season, right?”

He looked up at her. “How did you know? Did she tell you?”

“Yeah, she told me a lot of stories about you. She was so in love. I see how her eyes shine and how her lips curve into a smile every time she talks about you, and knowing that both of you are going to be parents made her so happy.”

“Seolhee has been (Y/N)’s companion and she was a good friend to her.” Jihoon smiled, trying to lift the spirits up.

“We’ve become best friends because of the child. It’s sad that our friendship had to last shortly.” Seolhee said in a woeful voice.

Seungkwan felt his heart sink even deeper with what he heard, but despite the love of his life gone, he can still smile because of their daughter. And that’s what’s left of their love―a child whom he could start over his life with.

 

Before he ends his story, he calls for the little girl in the crowd which caught the attention of everyone. “This is our daughter, Bomi.”

“She’s very beautiful. How old is she?” The interviewer asked.

“Of course, she looks like her mom.” He smiled warmly whilst looking at his daughter and stroking her hair. “She’s five years old.”

Through the years, his daughter has grown into a smart girl just like (Y/N). She has her mother’s beautiful eyes, her father’s plump lips and both of her parents’ round face―she’s a lovely girl.

 

Seungkwan arrived at the airport, together with his daughter and his mother, and was greeted by (Y/N)’s family. They immediately went to visit her tomb for (Y/N)’s fifth death anniversary. Seungkwan placed the flowers beside her grave, and then the wind blew. It’s as if he heard her speak through the wind.

_“You’ll wait for me, right?”_

And then he answered. “Ever since I was thirteen, all I ever did was wait for you to be mine. Waiting for you in the next life won’t be any different, as long as your heart beats for me until then.”

_“It will only beat for you, always.”_

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry for killing the reader sjdjhd this was a short story I wrote for creative writing and I based the main lead off Seungkwan.


End file.
